Pradhan Kaka

I touched briefly on Pradhan Kaka in my last entry about Memories of Malaysia.
He was quite a character really.
When we met him for the first time in 1971, he was already past 55, and looked more like 65 really.
He was not very tall, dressed very simply, slightly bent, with watery blue-green eyes, and a kindly face.
With the influx in Marathi speaking families around 1970-71, he sort of adopted us all, and he was a common fixture at all get togethers.
He used to live in a small house in Bangsar area of KL, not far from the National Museum. He was a widower, but the pride of his life was his son Vinayak, who at the time had just finished High school.

Over the years, as we kept talking, the story of his life came to light slowly.
He was from Mumbai, and did not have much formal education, and shifted between odd jobs. Things became so tough at the end of the World War 2, that he thought of looking for his fortune outside India. One fine day he just landed in Singapore with the clothes he was wearing and little more than that. That must have been late in the decade of 1940, though I am not sure of the year.
He tried his hand at everything, starting with selling Agarbattis, and selling nearly every thing else. Times must have been really hard with Malaysia itself not doing so well. He did not know the language, which he had to learn from the scratch.
He did not have a place to stay, and stayed with people for the initial years. He made some durable friends also. The Tata family in Malaysia was one of them. Mr. Tata worked in the Rubber Research Institute, and I think, was childless. He stayed with the Tata family for a while and they became great friends. Life for Pradhan kaka must have been always hard.
When he was about 40 he received a marriage proposal from India. The lady was from a well-known family in Pune, the Guptes.[ Col. Hemachandra Gupte was the brother of the bride]. They were married somewhere around 1955 or so. Vinay was born and I can imagine that all their life revolved around the child, which was born late in Pradhan kaka's life.Those must have been happy times.
Tragedy struck just when he was savoring the rare happy part of his life.
After a brief illness, Vinay's mother passed away when he was just 7 years old.
This must have been a thunderbolt, and one can only imagine how Pradahan kaka must have coped in a strange country as a single parent of a seven year old. He did not talk much of those days. Tata family must have been a great help.

When we met Pradhan kaka in 1971, he was frail and pushing 60, with a teenager son, brilliant in his school, but apparently with not the best communication with his father, perhaps as a reflection of boy's age then. On the other hand I became immediately friendly with Vinay, [who had by 1973 joined the Law school in Singapore], who perhaps identified the 30 year me as nearer to his age group.
He played cricket for his school, college, and then even for a state in their league matches. So that was another common point of interest.[ I even turned out for his team the VI Old Boys in one match]

He had radical views on socialism, the idle rich, and the partying rich. We had a lively, but for me a little worrying, exchange at a dinner in our house when the guests also included the Kashyap family [MD of my company, and who fell into the category generally disliked by Vinay]. Vinay was always enjoyable company for me.

Prdahan kaka in the mean time would always be a part of all our dinners. he enjoyed Marathi food. Mostly quiet, sipping his beer, his was a comforting presence of an elder at these gatherings. He made it a point to come to all our picnics. He had not read much, but knew enough to insert some Pu La quotations once in a while.
He of course enjoyed being with us all, the so-called extended family of his, and enjoyed interludes of Marathi family life which he had missed out on most of his life. He loved all the small children around, and they too flocked around him.
He knew all about the political scene of Malaysia of course, and though a bit old fashioned, it was enjoyable to discuss the day's politics with him.

The one common strain that came across as he conversed with you was his anxiety of how Vine was shaping and what would be his future. He was at one level trying to find out from us as to what he had confided in us.

Then suddenly around 1978[Again not too sure of the year], he was diagnosed with cancer, and in no time at all was hospitalized. So much was Vinay's future on his mind, that in his last days in delirium, he was asking the hospital nurse if she would marry Vinay. We went to see him a couple of times, but he was slipping very fast, and the end came much too soon.

I still remember the last rites.
Vinay broke down completely, as the only pillar of his life was consigned to flames.
So a lonely hard fought life of Pradhan kaka ended, but leaving fond memories for us.


Postscript.

There have been many occasions subsequently when I met Vinay. Now the roles were reversed, he was now asking me repeatedly as to what his father used to talk about him. A father, with whom he had not perhaps complete rapport, had gone and now he wanted to know how much the father loved him.
Very poignant indeed.

I am tempted to say this, but is there a message here somewhere?
I think it is, ' Show love to a person close to you before it is too late'.

Vinay is now one of the best-known corporate lawyers in Malaysia. He has married Varsha, a Malaysian Indian, herself a Barrister. They have two lovely children, and a fabulous house in PJ. We are in touch often. Every time I see Vinay's full life with its comforts, the thought in my mind is inescapable, Pradhan kaka is not here to see all the good part of life, he only suffered hardships.